Development
Themes: Cognitive Development | Neurodiversity | Executive Functioning
Published February 2026
When we think about preparing children for adulthood, it’s easy to imagine it begins in the teenage years. In reality, the foundations for adult wellbeing are laid much earlier. From birth, children learn to think, relate, regulate, and make sense of the world around them. Understanding early developmental stages and offering support that fits each child’s individual needs quietly shapes the kind of adults they will grow into. Although formal Preparing for Adulthood planning often begins later, the cognitive and emotional building blocks are formed through everyday experiences in early childhood. In that sense, preparation for adulthood does not start at fourteen; it begins in the earliest interactions, relationships, routines, and moments of support.
A neurodiversity-informed perspective on early development
Every child experiences cognitive development differently. Brains grow at different rates, make connections in different ways, and respond uniquely to the world around them. This variation is not something that needs fixing. It is a natural part of human diversity.
When supporting children, it is important to look beyond age-based expectations and developmental milestones. A child’s behaviour, communication, interests, and ways of engaging with their environment often tell us far more about how they are developing than their chronological age alone. Both neurotypical and neurodivergent children grow, learn, and become independent, but they do so along different pathways.
Cognitive development refers to how children learn to think, understand, remember, communicate, and solve problems. In early childhood, these skills develop through a combination of brain growth, relationships, and everyday experiences.
You might see cognitive development when a child begins to use objects symbolically:
a block becomes a phone, a spoon becomes a rocket, or a cardboard box becomes a house. This kind of play isn’t “just imagination”. It shows that the child is learning to represent ideas, think flexibly, and explore meaning.
All children go through these changes, but not in the same way or at the same pace. Some children repeat the same play many times. Others explore intensely in short bursts. Watching how a child explores and experiments often tells us more than comparing them to other children of the same age.
What do we mean by cognitive development?
How the brain supports thinking and learning
As children grow, their brains form and strengthen connections between different areas. These connections help thinking become faster and more coordinated over time.
In everyday life, this might look like a child gradually learning to:
- Wait for their turn
- remember and follow simple instructions
- stay with a task for longer
- cope with frustration
For some children, these skills take longer to develop or need different kinds of support. This does not mean a child is less capable. It reflects natural differences in how brains develop.
Developmental psychologist Jean Piaget described how young children use symbols and ideas but often struggle to see things from other people’s perspectives. This is typical in early childhood. Neurodivergent children may exhibit these patterns in different ways, for example, through intense interests, literal thinking, or unique problem-solving approaches.
Learning through relationships and support
Psychologist Lev Vygotsky highlighted the importance of social interaction for early learning. Children often learn best when someone supports them just enough to move forward, not by doing things for them, but by guiding, modelling, or encouraging.
You might notice this when:
- a parent talks a child through a task step by step
- an adult models how to approach a problem
- a teacher gently redirects attention
Over time, skills that need support become skills a child can manage independently.
For neurodivergent children, this support might include visual cues, hand-over-hand modelling, sensory adjustments, or alternative communication methods. These supports do not reduce independence. Instead, they help build it concretely.
Language and thinking
Language develops quickly in early childhood and plays a major role in learning. Children use language to communicate with others and to organise their own thoughts.
You may hear a child talking themselves through an activity:
“First this… then that.”
This kind of self-talk helps with planning, problem-solving, and emotional regulation. Over time, it becomes internal thinking/ inner speech.
Some neurodivergent children may use fewer spoken words or communicate differently. They might rely more on gestures, pictures, technology, or action rather than speech. These differences do not mean a lack of understanding. They reflect different pathways for thinking and learning.
Executive function: managing thoughts, feelings, and actions
Executive function is a term used to describe skills like:
- remembering and organising information
- controlling impulses
- switching between activities
- managing emotions
These skills help children follow routines, cope with change, and manage frustration when things do not go according to plan.
In everyday life, executive function helps a child leave the park when it is time to go, remember classroom rules, and handle changes in the environment. Some children find these transitions harder and benefit from predictable routines, visual schedules, and reassurance support. These strategies do not make children dependent; they help them develop self-regulation over time.
Understanding others
Children gradually learn that other people have their own thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. This understanding develops differently for different children.
Neurodivergent children may show this awareness in less obvious ways. Supportive relationships, clear communication, and adults who model empathy help all children develop social understanding without pressure or comparison.
The role of environment and culture
Children’s thinking develops within their environments. Family relationships, cultural values, language exposure, play opportunities, and early education all shape how cognitive skills grow.
For neurodivergent children, environments that:
- respect sensory needs
- allow free movement
- offer multiple ways to engage
can make a significant difference. Sometimes a quiet space, visual instructions, or the freedom to move while learning can support thinking more effectively than formal instructions alone.
Final thoughts
Cognitive development in early childhood is shaped by both brain growth, relationships, and the environments in which children live and learn. All children develop at their own pace and in their own way. When adults understand and respect these differences, they are better able to offer meaningful support. Rather than pushing children to fit unrealistic expectations, we can create conditions that allow every child to grow and learn, not by becoming someone else, but by becoming more fully themselves.
When viewed through the lens of Preparing for Adulthood, early cognitive development takes on added significance. The ways children learn to think, regulate, communicate, and problem-solve in early childhood gradually shape how they approach independence, relationships, learning, and decision-making later in life. Although statutory PfA planning formally begins much later, the cognitive building blocks that support autonomy, self-understanding, and participation are already being laid through everyday interactions and support. Recognising this helps adults focus less on readiness at a particular age, and more on creating developmental conditions that allow children to grow into adulthood with confidence, flexibility, and a secure sense of self.
Evidence note
This reflection draws on research in developmental psychology, cognitive neuroscience, and education, including theories of cognitive development by Jean Piaget and sociocultural learning theory by Lev Vygotsky. It is also informed by contemporary neurodiversity-affirming research that recognises natural variability in brain development, executive functioning, language acquisition, and social understanding across both neurotypical and neurodivergent children.
Current evidence highlights early childhood cognition as a dynamic interaction between neurological development, relationships, and environment. Research consistently shows that responsive adult support, flexible learning environments, and strengths-based approaches promote cognitive growth, emotional regulation, and increasing independence, particularly for neurodivergent children.
Chamdini Pannipitiya
Developmental & Systems Analyst on Preparing for Adulthood
Founder, Café Brainwaves
Café Brainwaves 